Fighting FOMO: The Power of Going Big

Beat FOMO by going big.

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 Hey, there is a ton of research out there chronicling how social media fuels fomo, which in turn leads to overspending. There are also some great tips on how to avoid this trap. Probably the best advice I’ve seen is from Shannon Lee Simmons, Canadian, who pushes people to try a short social-media hiatus. A detox, so to speak.

Kelley Keehn, a recent guest on our podcast, also pushes that. The break can break the cycle sometimes, but even when it doesn’t work fully effectively, it does tend to shine a light on where your triggers were. What accounts you need to avoid going forward. There’s lots of good stuff online about all of this.

The problem is for many, FOMO doesn’t flow as much from social-media accounts, as it does from our best friends and our group’s invites. Let’s go to dinner! What about the Jays game? When’s the bachelorette and bachelor weekends? Are you going to Chuck’s destination wedding? And so on and so forth. It never stops. Temptation island! But thinking about it the way I’m about to outline has really helped some of my friends.

Saying no — to others and to yourself and to good times — I admit, is difficult. It’s a skill. It really is. You have to develop it. It requires self-discipline. It requires practice. I repeat, it requires practice. So start with one no, one “I’m going to pass.” Just one. But, and this is crucial, make it something you really wanted to do, but know you couldn’t afford to. Something that hurts to say no to. Why? Why not start with something you weren’t really that excited by in the first place? “Doesn’t that make more sense, Dave? Build up slowly.” Strangely, no. Because when you say no to something big that you think is going to really, really hurt, and the amazing event comes and you miss it, you quickly learn an invaluable lesson:

It didn’t really, really hurt. You were wrong. Life goes on. You ate some popcorn, watched Netflix with a friend who also fought off the “concert of the decade” (until the next one) and you had a great night. You’ve heard of JOMO? The joy of missing out. There’s so much freedom to skipping some things. To being in control. To not defining yourself by your social calendar.

I’m serious about all this. Say no once to something “epic” and a big part of this battle will quickly be won. That experience will be the ultimate teacher. Heck, call me if you’re just sitting in. Trust me, I’ll be at home. I’m immune to FOMO. I have FOBI — fear of being invited